rivendellrose:

riis-reborn:

everwizard:

Weed strains are like “smells of banana with a slightly nutty note” my brother in christ it smells like weed

IPA breweries will describe their beer as “a citrusy and bright barley flavor with a floral finish!” and the IPA tastes like tap water that sat on your dresser for so long it developed an anti-predator warding mechanism

No, no, no. They’re right. It is citrusy. Because EVERY SINGLE MOTHERFUCKING IPA TASTES LIKE BAD GRAPEFRUIT JUICE.

I live in Seattle. And I swear to god every single brewery in the whole Pacific Northwest has EIGHTEEN GODDAMNED FUCKING IPAs, one gose, and one single solitary pilsner if I’m very fucking lucky. Seasonals? Yeah, you got your pumpkin or brown ale in the fall, your stout something-or-other in the winter, maybe a hef or something in the summer, and otherwise it’s GRAPEFRUIT MOTHERFUCKING EVERYWHERE, because there is nothing on tap anywhere but IPAs, my friend, and they’re all in a race to the bottom to have the highest IBU count.

And you know what kills me? I fucking LIKE grapefruit juice. I do! But IPA tastes like SAD BAD WRONG grapefruit juice, and I hate it. My husband will be like “Oh, try this one, it’s an IPA but I think you might like it!” and I take a sip and say, “Yup, tastes like grapefruit juice.”

Do something different, breweries. Think outside the grapefruit.