i don’t know what other queer folks might need to hear this, but your sexual desire for someone doesn’t contaminate your love for them and it doesn’t mean you don’t respect them or see them as a complete person. and you wouldn’t be better or purer if you could love without wanting them in that way also. queer sexuality is not a contaminant that ruins queer love.
This post is about fuckin specifically!!!!
I have never felt so called out about a problem I didnt realize was a problem
Icon from a picrew by grgikau. Call me Tir or Julian. 37. He/They. Queer. Twitter: @tirlaeyn. ao3: tirlaeyn. 18+ Only. Star Trek. Sandman. IwtV. OMFD. Definitionless in this Strict Atmosphere.
you promised to put out a new fic chapter today but your brain seems to be working against you ? totally cool, i understand !
you said you were gonna answer some asks but you’re feeling a little overwhelmed ? no worries, we can wait !
you decided you were going to post some art today but you’re just too busy to finish it ? all good, there’s always tomorrow !
give yourself a break sometimes. work at your own pace. congratulate yourself for any amount of progress.
creating content is hard, okay.
you’re already doing wonderfully. no pressure. you got this.
not sure if this will make sense to anyone besides me but: the antidote to negativity is not positivity, its warmth
positivity tells a sad person that there is no reason to be sad. warmth asks the sad person if they want to go get some ice cream
I used to hate using ‘love’ liberally. I felt it was a sacred word only to be used in very special occasions. Now that I’m older, I’ve come to the realization that love should be shared and felt and received with reckless abandon. Love these characters, love this food, love things in the moment, even if they may seem tiny and insignificant to others. I think it makes life a little more soft around the edges.
Love is not a finite resource.
One of the very first riddles I learned as a kid was from my father. He asked me, “what is the one thing that, no matter how much you give away, you will always have more than you started with?” It took me a while before I figured it out, but yeah, don’t be stingy with love or telling people that you love them.
‘Proper grammar is racist’ ?????????????? I’m sorry wh
“Proper” grammar has long been decided by and canonized by the upper (predominately white) class- causing lower class and minority dialects (and the people who speak them) to be treated as inferior and uneducated.
I have a vested interest in proper grammar and punctuation. I am a working class peasant, and a writer.
Care to, maybe, reassess that statement?
I am an English teacher, with an education in linguistic history and sociolinguiatics. Consider that maybe your personal relationship with language is not universal.
So what you’re saying here @fandomsandfeminism is that the solution is allow the breakdown of English into mutually hostile class and regional dialects rather than, ya know, teach everyone English.
People who speak AAVE and Appalachian English ARE speaking English already.
Which version of English is the one you think deserves to be the only one?
I learned standard English because my parents had some grammar books lying around and I read them. Had I not done that or had access to said books, my job prospects would be even more dismal than they are. The only realistic alternative to teaching upper-class norms in the schools is ensuring that they’re only taught to the children of the upper class, or of the children of the few not-upper-class parents who buy a lot of books.
But I notice that a lot of the people who insist that teaching the standard is bad are also active producers of upper-class norms, and are invested in making them as complex and as distasteful as they can. So maybe that’s the point!
Nobody in this thread said anything against teaching the standard variety. The original tweet even said, “multiple english vernaculars”.
This is just like John McWhorter’s observation that whenever he talks about how AAVE/Black English has a complete grammatical structure and is not inherently worse than any other variety of English, someone always goes “But interviews! Interviews! What do think will happen if they speak that way at job interviews!” —Well he didn’t say anything about job interviews, damn it! He didn’t say we should abandon Standard English; the point he’s making is that it’s diglossia - one variety isn’t inherently more correct, it’s about two different varieties being used in different areas of life and society.
This is huge, and linguistic racism/classism is insidious and evil. If you need it taken it to extremes for the purposes of illustrating why it’s bad to shit on people for how they speak in their day to day lives, please remember the millions of native kids, Cajun and Creole kids, and other pockets of extreme linguistic diversity in the US who had their native languages and dialects beaten out of them in schools until those languages and dialects and cultures disappeared or became extremely endangered.
You can give someone a strong and varied linguistic toolset for interacting the world around them, including teaching them Standard English, without making assumptions about the intelligence of people who use other equally valid dialects, or being awful at them online or in day-to-day conversation because you don’t approve of the way they use words.
And for the record? Standard English being a priority in job interviews that don’t involve mass communication, education, etc? That’s racist and classist, too. And ableist, because if your first language is ASL that can significantly influence your spoken and especially written English grammar just as much as if your first language is Portuguese or whatever, and you’re less likely to get focused ESL education.
Being jealous and insecure is okay. Demanding that your friend or partner stop seeing their other friends isn’t.
Wanting attention is okay. Demanding your friend or partners attention 24/7 isn’t.
Being angry is okay. Taking your anger out on innocent people isn’t.
We can’t control our feelings and we shouldn’t attempt to, but we can and should work to control our reactions to said feelings.
On the "Goldwater Rule"
The trouble with personality disorders is lack of representation, and this comes from a deep-seeded problem in their sufferers, a lack o...
The trouble with personality disorders is lack of representation, and this comes from a deep-seeded problem in their sufferers, a lack of introspection. This comes, as we have discussed before, from the disorders being ego-syntonic, or rather, the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors exhibited by their sufferers are in tune with the wants and needs of their ego. This is a stark contrast to disorders like Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder which are ego-dystonic, where the sufferer recognizes they have a problem, are troubled by it, and want help coping with it. When there is lack of introspection to one’s own problems, this can lead to lack of representation for that community, leaving the only figureheads for their plight to be the worst case scenarios which bubble to the top. As much as I would like to avoid this discussion all together, it is time for us to talk about Donald Trump.
This one’s goes out to all my NPD Bitches! Especially you, @npdbitch <3
@slut-shaman, @disorderly-conduct, @narcissisticprincess, @reinedescruelles, @bpdcandy, @covert-narcissism, @cenkrettYou have an engaging, conversational style of writing and I like your thorough explanations (which you give without going on tangents).
Important, timely, and stunningly well-written.
the main problem i have with glorifying attractive ppl and the privileges they’re afforded is (esp for younger folks) there’s this idolization that comes with pretty ppl when they’re jus regular folks ! and in relationships there’s the partner who deems themselves as the lesser or unattractive partner so they walk on eggshells with the mind of “omg i have to be the best possible partner ever emotionally/mentally cuz this person is so hot they can do so much better than me” and that’s so ugly !!! and not true !!! that person is with you for a reason and saw something in you and there’s no such thing as “out of my league” !! and don’t let someone treat you as less than you deserve because you think they’re pretty and will leave if you’re not perfect
sure, not all men, but a lot of men, and we have no way of knowing which ones
“sure, not all black people, but a lot of black people, and we have no way of knowing which ones.”
This is exactly how you sound.
“sure, not all muslims, but a lot of muslims, and we have no way of knowing which ones.”
lettuce consult the fbi data:
Of the 1,864 women murdered in 2010, 91% were killed by men. (by contrast, of the 3,872 men murdered, only 9% were killed by women). Of all the women murdered (by either sex), over a third were killed by a husband or boyfriend. women have legitimate reason to fear men, even the ones they know.
Of the 3,327 white people murdered in 2010, only 13% were killed by black people. 3% were killed by other or unknown races. white people do not have a statistically legitimate reason to fear other races.
women’s fear of men is based in reality, not bigotry. white people’s fear of other races is based in bigotry, not reality.
This deserves much more than 294 notes
OH MY GOD THANK YOU