Icon from a picrew by grgikau. Call me Tir or Julian. 37. He/They. Queer. Twitter: @tirlaeyn. ao3: tirlaeyn. 18+ Only. Star Trek. Sandman. IwtV. OMFD. Definitionless in this Strict Atmosphere.
I fully understand why westerners thought the platypus was a hoax at first. I’m looking at a real live one moving around and it STILL looks fake.
The one thing that could have made them sound any more made up would have been if you said the boys have secret viper fangs that can absolutely fuck you up with venom, and they do, on their goddamn feet.
cursed platypus facts: * five (5) X chromosomes * only the left ovary works * produces milk but has no nipples. the mother just kind of sweats milk out their chest. nature is beautiful * was nearly called the “duckmole” * swims with its weird fish eyes and ears closed, hunting entirely by electroreception * born with teeth, but then they fall out
If you don’t want this beautiful picture of Steve Irwin holding a baby platypus on your blog then I’m sorry but I don’t know what you’re doing with your life.
I fully understand why westerners thought the platypus was a hoax at first. I’m looking at a real live one moving around and it STILL looks fake.
The one thing that could have made them sound any more made up would have been if you said the boys have secret viper fangs that can absolutely fuck you up with venom, and they do, on their goddamn feet.
cursed platypus facts: * five (5) X chromosomes * only the left ovary works * produces milk but has no nipples. the mother just kind of sweats milk out their chest. nature is beautiful * was nearly called the “duckmole” * swims with its weird fish eyes and ears closed, hunting entirely by electroreception * born with teeth, but then they fall out
platypus shoulders are real fuckin weird- the scapula is actually flipped vertically so it sticks straight up into the air and there’s a whole extra bone in the joint that no other mammal has!
this arrangement serves as an anchor point for the platypus’s MASSIVE fucking forelimb muscles and has a lot in common with lizard shoulders, of all things!
but the real takeaway here is this: you know how platypus is shaped like football?
(please do not kick platypus)
that’s all muscle.
muscle with some flippers sticking out the sides like an afterthought.
just don’t laugh too hard, you’ll hurt their feelings.
I did that thing where I take a tumblr post that made me laugh out loud and record it. Thank you @sucymemebabaran and @farfetchling for crackling me up at 4 o’clock in the fucking morning.
BEHOLD MY TERRIBLE FIRST ATTEMPT AT A
DOOFENSCHMIRTZ IMPRESSION