skybisonandcompany:

wanderingcynic:

femmeanddangerous:

Artifact from the secret cabinets of Catherine the Great. Commissioned by her lover Grigory Orlov.

No queen should rule without her trusty penis knife.

Catherine the Great: “is that a knife in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

Grigory Orlov: *pulls out knife*

Catherine: “OH MY GOD IT’S BOTH”