fozmeadows:

jenndoesnotcare:

I just left my husband alone with our two children for sixteen days. I was not worried about anything regarding the house, their food, or their wellbeing. I put all the appointments in the family calendar and my husband checked it and kept them. I literally did not worry about them. I missed them, and I was sad that they missed me, but I didn’t worry about them AT ALL. I need to impress upon you all that I missed their company, but was not worried for their welfare.

I also did no meal prep. I don’t even think I went shopping right before I left.

This is not about apples and oranges. This isn’t even about my husband. This is about the fact that this is apparently WEIRD.

Another mum at my daughter’s school is leaving for ten days. She’s taking her youngest (who is a very small baby) and leaving her husband with their two girls. She has been cooking for days preparing freezer meals. She’s panicking and deputizing her six year old to remind him how to make school lunches. AND I AM APPALLED.

A) He is definitely not helpless. (He’s a doctor or something.) What gendered bullshit. B) THAT LITTLE GIRL IS NOT OLD ENOUGH TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR HER AND HER SISTER’S WELLBEING. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. C) Why is she married to this person and creating children with him if he’s this big of an idiot?

While she was laughingly recounting this, the other mums were nodding and smiling sympathetically, like oh yes, I too have my caveman at home!! Such managing required! I was the only one who was like “Dude, he’ll be fine. Literally. He will be fine.” I said it a lot. She was not convinced. She kept bringing up her older daughter. She’ll be like a little mum!

NO.

NO NO NO NO.

NO.

Straight women, don’t do this shit. It’s gross. Don’t infantilize your husbands and then expect your daughters to pick up the slack. So fucking gross. So. So. GROSS.

The fact that so many adults think a six year old girl is more capable of learning and performing basic domestic tasks than a grown-ass man says it all, really. 

harryedward:

let your child be goofy and silly and make messes. teach them to clean up the messes without yelling at them. let your child be a child. not a mini adult who has to be perfect 24/7

joannechocolat:

1. Make sure your kids see YOU reading (and enjoying it). There’s no point expecting them to do something you don’t do yourself.

2. Read to your children regularly. Make it part of their bedtime routine. Reading together helps parents bond with their children, and later, it gives them a chance to discuss all kinds of problems and ideas.

3. Don’t be a teacher when you’re reading to your kids. Be an entertainer instead. Go ape on the funny voices. Make it fun for both of you.

4. Don’t be judgemental or preachy. Choose books that deal with topics that will really engage your child.

5. Don’t approach your child’s reading as you would their education. Reading isn’t about setting targets, or impressing your friends with your child’s reading age.

6. Read the first half of a story aloud, then allow yourself to be “interrupted”. Leave the book lying around. Ten to one they’ll pick it up…

7. Whatever your child chooses to read, support it. That goes for comics, fairy books, romance or fart jokes. 

8. Don’t put your child under pressure. Reading should be a reward, never a punishment.

9. Don’t stop your child from re-reading books, or having you re-read them. It’s an important comfort mechanism. 

10. Age banding is irrelevant. Gender is irrelevant. Reading age is irrelevant. Is your kid reading? Then they’re OK.

Lastly, NEVER take a book from your child. Whether it’s a “girl book”, a “boy book”, a silly book or MEIN KAMPF. Don’t be afraid they’ll be influenced in a negative way. Where children read widely, they’re very unlikely to be influenced by any single set of ideas. Instead, they’ll learn to question ideas, and more importantly, to think for themselves…

cordria:

I was watching my little niece today. She’s seven and the definition of spoiled brat. She knows I don’t take much of it though, and is pretty good when her parents aren’t around. Unfortunately, she’s been taught to respond to the unknown or ‘scary’ with fear instead of curiosity.

So this morning she runs up to me, shrieking about a spider in the basement and wants me to go kill it.

Firstly, there are lots of spiders in the basement. Secondly, I like spiders. They do good things for the environment and cut down on the bugs-I-don’t-like population. Thirdly, I’m hella lazy. My kiddo had just fallen asleep and I wasn’t getting off the couch for anything less than armageddon. A spider wasn’t going to cut it.

So I ask her what kind of spider. When she looks confused, I briefly describe the local wolf spider, jumping spider, and orb weavers. She doesn’t look like she cares, but I say I won’t go down there unless I know what I’m dealing with. She runs off and comes back telling me it’s a wolf spider.

So I ask her how big it is. She fetches a ruler, I show her how to use it, and she runs off. Comes back with her finger on the ruler to show where the spider made it to. You can guess how close she got to the ‘scary spider’.

So I ask her what it looks like. Colors and patterns and whatever. She goes downstairs, comes back and tries to badly explain. Then she borrows my phone to go take a picture. This transitions into a quick lesson on how to take a photo when all she gets is blurriness.

So we end up on the internet after she gets her picture, finding out exactly what kind of spider it is and what it eats and why it’s okay to not kill the spider. She decides to name it Leggy. Then she runs downstairs and proceeds to take pictures of all the other spiders and various bugs she can find.

So I get her a jar. We poke holes in the lid and she carefully collects the best of the bugs, although she’s a bit heartbroken when she can’t find Leggy anymore. 

By the time her mother comes to pick her up, she’s got a dozen spiders, a centipede, and a silverfish for pets. All have names, many have been drawn on the paper next to it, along with a plan for how to feed them and keep them alive. 

The look on my sister-in-law’s face at the sight of the jar of ‘pets’ will delight me forever. :)

septemberwildflowers:

here’s a thought

let’s tell young boys that they are brimming with kindness and imagination and nobility. point out their gentleness, their fierce joy and limitless capacity to love everyone and everything. tell them they are princes in a kingdom of wonders and beauty and thoughtfulness and the warmth of their own hearts. take them to museums and symphonies and forests to make tree forts in. raise them to empathize, innovate and do good things. with confidence and humility.

septemberwildflowers:

here’s a thought

let’s tell young boys that they are brimming with kindness and imagination and nobility. point out their gentleness, their fierce joy and limitless capacity to love everyone and everything. tell them they are princes in a kingdom of wonders and beauty and thoughtfulness and the warmth of their own hearts. take them to museums and symphonies and forests to make tree forts in. raise them to empathize, innovate and do good things. with confidence and humility.