andhumanslovedstories:

andhumanslovedstories:

andhumanslovedstories:

andhumanslovedstories:

Screaming dying shrieking murdering the worst thing possible happened to me during our apartment inspection and I simply must flee the country

The inspector gave us a talk about how he’s not here to judge how we live our lives, then he walked into my bedroom and shrieked with laughter and fellas. Fellas. Fellas. Fellas. I’m gonna make you wait in suspense the same way I did. Because. Because. God I can’t even continue

He comes out of my bedroom and he asks “so are you a big fan of Supernatural or just a big fan of Jensen Ackles” which is. The worst question any human has ever asked me. Because I have a. Non-zero amount of supernatural merch in my room. All of which I’ve accumulated in the last three years like a real war criminal. And I said “oh my god” and he said “nah it’s cool, I like supernatural license plate on my leg” and I’m like “cool man. I. Suppose now I can’t talk about how I hate this show and how there’s a deep sense of irony with which I own Supernatural stickers on my bookshelf. So I guess I just have to say that I enjoy the show too.” (PLEASE NOTE—AT THIS POINT, I ASSUME HE IS REACTING TO THE SUPERNATURAL STICKERS I HAVE ON MY BOOKSHELF) and Amelia comes in to save my ass by saying the truth, which is so many of my friends have taken to giving me Supernatural gag gifts, and we all had a little chuckle

And then he left

And I went into my room

And I saw what he saw

I need a two minute pause to scream hold on

Forgot this pillow was on my bed

just-a-bogbear:

A brief insight into a world where animals vocalize like Pokémon:

Patient: “What’s wrong with me?”

Doctor: “Well let’s take a listen.”

Muffled voice from inside patient: “Tapeworm”

:

irresistible-revolution:

really sad garashir headcanon/ au: garashir are in a relationship when julian is taken by the dominion and eventually killed by the jem’hadar in internment camp 371, but changeling!julian is so effective at copying the garashir dynamic that even garak doesn’t cotton on to him being an imposter, even in their intimate moments. but, the more the changeling commits himself to julian’s life and delves deeper into his childhood the more he realizes he loves being julian and being in this relationship with garak, and the more he begins to lose touch with the great link and instead bond with the solids he’s surrounded by daily. lines start to blur. he lulls himself into an uneasy peace, procrastinating his mission, essentially playing both sides as he bides his time and decides on a course of action. then the message from tain arrives, and despite the changeling’s best efforts he can’t stop garak from hightailing it to the alpha quadrant. garak arrives at camp 371 and learns the truth - the real julian is dead, and he’s been going to bed with and loving an imposter this entire time while julian lay dead. 

garak contacts the station as soon as they escape, only to learn the imposter has turned himself in and also given starfleet intelligence a bulk of information on the dominion that might turn the tide of the war. the changeling asks to see garak one last time before he’s shipped off to a high-security starfleet facility, but garak refuses. eventually, after the end of the war, when changeling!julian - who remains in that form - is transferred to a slightly more lax facility, he’s given the right to send messages. so he records little holo messages of himself as julian, talking about his life now, the books he’s reading, how it’s nice to be allowed to stretch his legs, how he still thinks about his brief time on the station with garak, when he finally had a glimpse of what makes solid life so precious and consuming. he sends the messages to garak, who receives but never opens them at his home in cardassia, although sometimes he is sorely tempted, just to see julian’s face again, even if it may as well be a ghost.