woman-loving:

Actually what I think would be really beneficial is if people would stop thinking of “sexual orientation” as an unambiguous pattern of attraction that can be easily measured and then matched to a “correct” identity term. Sexuality isn’t a diagnosis. There are so many variables involved in what could be called “sexuality,” and people interpret and assign meaning to their experiences differently. People draw on available categories through which to understand and construct themselves–or craft their own–and that process also inflects their experience. 

If you think you can examine the details of a person’s attraction pattern and make a precise observation of whether they’re “really” gay vs bisexual vs pansexual, based off some one-line technical definition, that itself might be part of the problem!