I want to take a moment to send my love and solidarity to LGBT Muslims in light of what’s going on. I know the pressure on you is already so high. Your faith is not to blame for this, you are not to blame for this. You’re allowed to mourn, too.
Icon by @ThatSpookyAgent. Call me Tir or Julian. 37. He/They. Queer. Twitter: @tirlaeyn. ao3: tirlaeyn. 18+ Only. Star Trek. The X-Files. Sandman. IwtV. OMFD. Definitionless in this Strict Atmosphere.
I’m proud to be labeled ‘Band Geek’ and 'Orchestra Dork’
I’m happy that, when I whip out sheet music in public, the majority of the people around me can’t understand what the random dots of ink on the paper are, what beauty the random marks; gibberish to them, creates. It’s my, and other musicians, little magic secret. I have this…awkward pride that I am able to understand something that so many people are missing out on.
I find it amusing, that when I have my istrument with me in public, strangers ask “oh is that a guitar? Trumpet? Tuba? Piccolo?”
They know nothing. They really know nothing……and I can’t believe I used to be like that once.
What I find sad, is that when I went up to my 12 year old cousin last week who is just entering middle school and said, “You should join band!”
She replied with, “Ew that’s for losers.”
This kind of hit me in the face, because I’ve forgotten about those stupid stereotypes since I’ve been in love with band for so long.I think it’s ok to not know much about music. I think it’s ok to not understand it.
But I don’t think it’s ok….. To think that that the connotation of ‘nerd,’ ‘dork’ and ‘geek’ are bad. So bad that being a ‘nerd’ = being a loser. I remember my 11 year old self used to think that, in the back of my mind. “I don’t want to be sorted in with the nerds.”But why did I think, that being a nerd, or a musician was bad?
How on earth did joining band becoming something ‘the cool kids’ not want to do?
Please tell this to middle school me who ignored music for a long time for fear of being uncool.
Men are using a powerful hashtag to fight back against emotional abuse
According to NCADV, 4 in 10 people have experienced some kind of coercive control from an intimate partner. Sadly, #MaybeSheDoesntHitYou is raising much-needed awareness for a widespread problem.
All right pals. I know people are going to roll their eyes at this and see it as an MRA thing, but this really isn’t about undermining abuse suffered by women. It’s about acknowledging that men can be abused, because people of all genders are capable of being abusive and some men have abusive partners. It’s about emotional abuse, which is notoriously hard to speak up about, affecting men, a group who are notoriously loath to speak up about being in an abusive relationship. So this is #important honestly.
Emotional abuse is serious and real and can happen to anyone. It can be perpetuated by people of ALL genders, regardless of wider social dynamics, and absolutely no one deserves to go through it.
I’d have preferred the hashtag not to be about straight relationships and to acknowledge that abuse can be perpetuated by people of all genders, but nonetheless, this is really important.abuse is abuse regardless of gender identity
“From time to time, sit close to the one you love, hold his or her hand, and ask, ‘Darling, do I understand you enough? Or am I making you suffer? Please tell me so that I can learn to love you properly. I don’t want to make you suffer, and if I do so because of my ignorance, please tell me so that I can love you better, so that you can be happy.“ If you say this in a voice that communicates your real openness to understand, the other person may cry.
That is a good sign, because it means the door of understanding is opening and everything will be possible again.
Maybe a father does not have time or is not brave enough to ask his son such a question. Then the love between them will not be as full as it could be. We need courage to ask these questions, but if we don’t ask, the more we love, the more we may destroy the people we are trying to love. True love needs understanding. With understanding, the one we love will certainly flower.”
— Thich Nhat Hanh, in “Peace Is Every Step: The Path of Mindfulness in Everyday Life”.
(via abiding-in-peace)
(via abiding-in-peace)
Women are conditioned since we are young that our final stage of fulfillment comes from finding love. We could be 25, successful and self-made, but at the end of the day people won’t see us as someone who made it so far in just 25 years, but how someone lived 25 years without finding a man. To every single woman out there who is working hard and grinding to achieve their goals- your success is valid. You as a woman are valid. And I pray there is only more and more success written for you in everything you pursue.
“
I was dying to
hear
someone say
That I didn’t need
to try so hard to be perfect,
That i was enough
and
it was okay.
— (via bled)
Stimming!
What is stimming?
In it’s most simple form, stimming is a repetitive body movement that self-stimulates one or more senses in a regulated manner.
What types of stims are there?
- Visual Stims
- Flapping hands, blinking and/or moving fingers in front of eyes, staring repetitively at a light, pressing on closed eyes to create visual effect [pressure phosphene], …
- Auditory Stims
- Snapping fingers, tapping on objects, listening to the same song on a loop, rolling Rs, “cat noises”, repeating words, putting hands over ears, singing, clicking tongue, humming…
- Tactile Stims
- Scratching, rubbing the skin with one’s hands or with an external object, pinching the skin, putting thumb inside fist, sucking thumb, rubbing hands/feet together, petting preferred textures, tying knots/twirling string, twirling/stroking hair…
- Vestibular Stims
- Moving body in rhythmic motion, rocking front and back or side-to-side, spinning, pacing, walking in circles, walking on tip-toes, jumping up and down…
- Taste Stims
- Licking body parts, licking an object…
- Smell Stims
- Smelling objects or hands, smelling other people…
- Rhythmic Stims
- Tapping on surfaces/objects/self, clicking fingers, making repetitive vocal sounds, bouncing legs, foot tapping, hand flapping, clicking pens, …
There are a lot of other stims as well that don’t necessarily fall under the category of “repetitive” such as pressure stimming, which are still just as valid. Basically if what you do serves the purpose of the stim, you can call it a stim.
Why do people stim?
People stim for all different kinds of reasons. They may stim when they are happy or excited, when they are stressed, as a part of their normal body language, as a way of communication, as a punishment, as a response to something internal or external, as a compulsion, to focus, to self soothe, etc. Stimming can be a coping mechanism, but it can also be so much more! No matter what reason someone has for stimming though, it’s important to remember that all stims are natural and normal.
Who stims?
Anyone that finds stimming useful, whether consciously or subconsciously, can stim. This includes neurotypicals, but mainly stimming is seen as something that neurodivergent people do and it occurs most frequently in:
- the autism spectrum
- sensory processing disorder (SPD)
- Tourette’s
- schizophrenia
- OCD
- people that experience mania/hypomania
- people with ADHD/ADD
- people with anxiety
- etc
Where can I find stim toys/jewelry?
Shout out to the ignored
Shout out to people who’s romantic and sexual orientation don’t match.
Shout out to people who are told they don’t really love their S/O because they’re not sexually attracted to them.
Shout out to people who are told it’s wrong to have casual sex without being in love.
Shout out to pansexuals & panromantics who are told they’re really bi.
Shout out to bisexuals & biromantics who are told they need to “pick a side”
Shout out to the aros and aces who are told they don’t face prejudice.
Shout out to the LGBT+ folk who’s problems are ignored.
Shout out to the LGBT+ folk who face prejudice from both outside and inside our community.
You are not broken. Your identity is valid. Don’t let anyone make you feel like your problems don’t matter, like you’re not one of us. You are one of us and you belong with us. You are LGBT+
“If you see beauty in something, don’t wait for others to agree.”
— Sherihan Gamal (via weltenwellen)
This is beautiful.