another-random-dom-3:

kyraneko:

argumate:

hella-cious:

misscrawfords:

argumate:

birth-muffins-death:

argumate:

daniel-r-h:

cop-disliker69:

argumate:

argumate:

someone asked me what fifty shades of grey was the other day and I was stumped as to what answer I could give that definitely wouldn’t prompt further questions.

discreet footnote links appear for “BDSM”, “Twilight”, “fanfiction”,

“What’s 50 Shades of Grey?”

“Oh dear, that’s a very complicated question. Let me start at the beginning: in the 1820s, Joseph Smith started a new religion called Mormonism, which grew rapidly before…”

Unrelated to this movement, in 1897 the Irish author Bram Stoker published a book called Dracula; although this was not the first work in the vampire fiction genre, it established much of the framework of how future works would be viewed, even when they deliberately avoid some of the tropes.

Donatien Alphonse François was born in 1740, but the world remembers him as Marquis de Sade, who gave his name to

Published in 1597, Shakespeare’s Romeo & Juliet is one of the most famous examples in a tradition of stories about young, forbidden love

The Pacific Northwest (PNW), sometimes referred to as Cascadia, is a geographic region in western North America bounded by the Pacific Ocean to the west and (loosely) by the Rocky Mountains on the east. Though no official boundary exists, the most common conception includes the Canadian province of British Columbia (BC) and the U.S. states of Idaho, Oregon, and Washington. Broader conceptions reach north into Southeast Alaska and Yukon, south into northern California, and east to the Continental Divide to include Western Montana and parts of Wyoming. Narrower conceptions may be limited to the coastal areas west of the Cascade and Coast mountains. The variety of definitions can be attributed to partially overlapping commonalities of the region’s history, culture, geography, society, and other factors.

While the concept of fanfiction is a relatively modern concept related to the rise of copyright law, the concept of creating fiction using the ideas and characters from a previous work of fiction is historically well-attested right from the literature of Ancient Greece where authors worked and reworked already existing myths into new genres.

While the rise of the Mormonism movement and Bram Stoker’s Dracula may appear unrelated, both share an aversion to traditional aspects of Christianity such as the Eucharist and crucifix….

(Which is probably why holy water and crosses don’t hurt twilight vamps. They hold no religious significance to Meyer (or conversely may be associated with satanism to her) and would seem like silly superstitions to incorporate into her vampire universe)

“It’s a retelling of Twilight, with the supernatural elements stripped out and refilled with explicit mediocre sex.”

Don’t get ahead of yourselves, people!

Where were we? Oh, right. Ok.

So, on September the 11th, 2001, Gerard Way, who was working as an intern and living in his mom’s basement, decided to take a trip into Manhattan …

windsweptinred:

OK, Hob thinks. So his friend can transform into animals. Noted, got it. Any animal, slightly taller then average. With jet black hair, slightly otherworldly eyes and a keen sense of awareness is most likely Dream. He’s not going to let the smug git get the jump on him next time. Oh no, turn around is fair play. He’s going to be the one sneaking up on him and saying, with his most devil may care attitude, ‘Hello Dream’ .

So when, one evening while heading for his car, he spots a large dog, dark as midnight, hanging round campus. Carefully regarding each student as they go about their business. He knows this is the chance he’s been waiting for. Up he saunters, grin on his face. Leans down and says, *Hello Dr…“ (actually, there’s too many people floating round here to just toss his friends name about)” Hello D, fancy seeing you here.“

Dracula can truthfully say that it is rare in this day and age he finds himself perplexed. But when a university professor, wrapped in tweed, interrupts his hunt, calls him by name and invites him back to his home for a cuppa. Well, who is he to pass up the invitation. This is the most entertaining thing that’s happened to him since the 19th century…

wellsbering:

bashir and garak dracula book club. garak has no idea what a vampire is (he’s never even heard of count dracula before now, he didn’t even know what genre the book was until he saw the tags on the file bashir sent him) but even HE can spot the red flags and he keeps insisting that jonathan is a dumbass for not leaving or trying to kill the count immediately. julian keeps trying to explain that for most humans, especially in the late victorian era, “my host is a supernatural being and i need to get tf out of here” is NOT your first conclusion when a guy throws your shaving mirror out the window, and garak responds with something about humans lacking a self-preservation instinct. his whole argument basically boils down to “if i were in a spooky old castle and my host gave me bad vibes i would simply leave. rip to jonathan harker but i’m different.” they argue about this in the replimat for 3 hours

How far into Dracula are all of you and does anyone know if I can sign up late?

karis-the-fangirl:

My sister and I worked out the perfect cast for Muppet Dracula

prokopetz:

reservoircat:

prokopetz:

wherehipposdrome:

prokopetz:

You ever wonder how the modern image of vampires would differ if Bram Stoker had randomly picked a completely different noble rank for Dracula?

Baron Dracula?

Viscount Dracula?

Marquis Dracula?

Or, how about anglicizing it into Earl Dracula? Fun fact: the abundance of evil counts in Gothic literature is 100% due to the foreignness of the title, because aristocracy is fine only as long as it’s our aristocracy. All foreign nobles are by definition decadent, degenerate, dissolute, and various other words starting with the letter d.

I’m sorry, but when I saw the phrase “Earl Dracula”, I had a sudden, vivid mental image of an AU where the Count gets staked, his curse gets automatically passed down the bloodline agnatic-style, and it turns out that the last scion of the house of Dracul is a NASCAR-watching, plaid-flannel-wearing good ol’ boy, who suddenly finds himself appointed the new Lord of Darkness.

See but this gives me an excellent mental picture of a musical montage of a Buffy-expy character hunting him down to the Dixie Chick’s seminal classic “Goodbye Earl”, and that is just wonderful.

Hell, if you’re gonna go that route, why not lift the plot from the song wholesale? The vampire hunter is the newly dubbed Count Earl’s ex-wife, and she teams up with her old highschool friend to take him down - just a couple of thirtysomething Southern gals against the vampire menace.

(For bonus points, have them hook up at the end like the song implies - everything’s better with lesbians, right?)