Icon by @ThatSpookyAgent. Call me Tir or Julian. 37. He/They. Queer. Twitter: @tirlaeyn. ao3: tirlaeyn. 18+ Only. Star Trek. The X-Files. Sandman. IwtV. OMFD. Definitionless in this Strict Atmosphere.
IM SO CONFUSED HOW DO PEOPLE NOT KNOW WHAT CHRISTMAS CRACKERS ARE
THEY’RE THESE THINGS
AND YOU GET TWO PEOPLE OK AND EACH PERSON GRABS ONE END AND PULLS
AND THEN IT BREAKS AND WHOEVER GETS THE MIDDLE BIT GETS THE STUFF INSIDE ( THAT’S HOW IT’S ALWAYS WORKED FOR ME ANYWAY)
AND THE STUFF INSIDE IS USUALLY A PAPER HAT & A CRAPPY JOKE AND TOY/GIANT PAPER CLIP OR SOMETHING
NOW YA KNOW ABOUT CHRISTMAS CRACKERS
Dear Americans,
I have been informed that these ( along with Christmas cake, mince pies, and Christmas pudding) do not exist in your country.
WTF. Is this true? How do you Christmas?!
lol No we don’t have crackers or mince pies. I think either Christmas cake or pudding might be fruit cake, which we do have. It’s culturally considered horrible food, but I rather like it.
We do have Christmas cookies though: Gingerbread people, gingerbread houses, sugar cookies cut into Christmas-themed shapes with mounds of red and green frosting. Plus many families have other varieties of cookie which they make every year. We also have pie, particularly pumpkin and pecan pie, although some might argue those are only for Thanksgiving. Oh and everything peppermint! Peppermint candy, peppermint hot chocolate, peppermint coffee drinks, chocolate peppermint cookies.
We string up absurd amounts of Christmas lights, overplay Christmas music in all the stores starting in October, get into fights over sales on Black Friday, spend audacious amounts of money on Christmas gifts for every person we’ve ever spoken to twice, and get extremely drunk on eggnog or hard cider.
