Icon by @ThatSpookyAgent. Call me Tir or Julian. 37. He/They. Queer. Twitter: @tirlaeyn. ao3: tirlaeyn. 18+ Only. Star Trek. The X-Files. Sandman. IwtV. OMFD. Definitionless in this Strict Atmosphere.

the signs as details in life

  • aries: pillows, coffee, puzzles, board games, nail polish
  • taurus: decorative tape, flower crowns, gardens, plushies, dyed hair
  • gemini: roses, lipstick, city streets, skylines, holding hands
  • cancer: clean sheets, notebooks, rain, socks, legos
  • leo: art, sleeping, saturday nights, trees, sunsets
  • virgo: privacy, showers, paint, long hugs, oversized shirts
  • libra: stickers, jackets, snow, fleece blankets, cats
  • scorpio: mountains, sunny weather, ink pens, radios, necklaces
  • sagittarius: old magazines, books, sweaters, flowers, crayons
  • capricorn: cuddles, headphones, new shoes, silence, nightlights
  • aquarius: cities, leather, sunglasses, vinyl, collages
  • pisces: lakes, dancing, old friends, new places, vacation

the signs as real witches

  • Aries: Agnes Waterhouse// Had a deal with the Devil and wasn't afraid to say so. The Brave witch.
  • Taurus: Joan Wytte// Clairvoyant and healer who eventually became possessed by the Devil, getting involved in many fights.
  • Gemini: Marie Laveau// Voodoo Queen. Performed necromancy, mind control, telekinesis and pinning.
  • Cancer: Chedipe// Witch-vampire who rode on tigers in the moonlight, choosing houses to visit to cast spells on men.
  • Leo: Agnes Sampson// Tried to sink the ship of Queen Anne, wife of King James VI of England.
  • Virgo: Isobel Gowdie// Could control the weather and would often write poetry about witch practices. Allegedly marked by the Devil.
  • Libra: Circe// Transformed random sailors into wolves and lions and all kinds of animals.
  • Scorpio: Mother Shipton// Clairvoyant, sorceress. An outcast with a great talent.
  • Sagittarius: Maret Jonsdotter// Frequently tricked men. Attended witch sabbaths.
  • Capricorn: Alice Kyteler// Poisoned her rich husbands, disappeared the night before her execution.
  • Aquarius: Angele de la Barthe// Allegedly had sex with the Devil.
  • Pisces: Catherine La Voisin// Fortune Teller & Love Potions expert. Plotted to murder Louis XIV.

how to turn the signs on

science-sexual:

agenderaromanticamethyst:

Aries: summon a couple hundred demons to be their servants and you’ll be off to a decent start

Taurus: only ancient Gregorian chants can excite Tauruses

Gemini: inappropriately timed references to shows that have been off the air for years

Cancer: two words: Yugioh Cards

Leo: speak only in Latin

Virgo: only direct appeals to the Ancient Gods of old will appease a Virgo

Libra: the whispers of the void are more than enough already

Scorpio: Send them back to the dimension from which they came

Sagittarius: I dunno, advanced trigonometry?

Capricorn: you can’t turn a Capricorn on. I’m sorry, that’s just how it works.

Aquarius: science

Pisces: slap them with a fish. trust me it works. 

I mean yeah 

the signs as f.r.i.e.n.d.s quotes

  • Aries: I win, you lose, I rule all, mini-wave in celebration of me!
  • Taurus: PIZZA, WE LIKE PIZZA!
  • Gemini: Should I use my invisibility to fight crime or for evil?
  • Cancer: Oh no, was I cleaning in my sleep again?
  • Leo: I wish I could but I don't want to.
  • Virgo: Why, why do bad things happen to good people?
  • Libra: I couldn't say no twice. I got this uncontrollable need to please people.
  • Scorpio: I’m really looking forward to you and me having sexual intercourse.
  • Sagittarius: I mean sure I have my bad days, but then I remember what a cute smile I have.
  • Capricorn: Oh I'm sorry did my back hurt your knife?
  • Aquarius: I just have this really strong feeling that this cat is my mother.
  • Pisces: What must it be like not to be crippled by fear and self-loathing?

Signs as Plants

saddenastrology:

Aries ; venus fly trap. looks sweet but bites.

Taurus ; wildflowers. will spread and bring beauty even if a block of cement is in their way.

Gemini ; aspen forests. they feel like everyone’s connected deep down.

Cancer ; lotus. even in dark places, they find their way into the light.

Leo ; roses. all fun and games until their thorns show.

Virgo ; ferns. they don’t need a finish line to start their journey.

Libra ; daisies. they are perky and grow fast.

Scorpio ; poison ivy. once you touch them, theres no going back.

Sagittarius ; cactus. they hurt very much, but with the right amount of nurturing they make one of the most beautiful things.

Capricorn ; oak trees. old and wise and caring, but sometimes get too much attention.

Aquarius ; sunflowers. hold their head up high and always look at the “bright” side.

Pisces ; lavender. soothing, light but always manages to be strong and make a change.