Icon from a picrew by grgikau. Call me Tir or Julian. 37. He/They. Queer. Twitter: @tirlaeyn. ao3: tirlaeyn. 18+ Only. Star Trek. Sandman. IwtV. OMFD. Definitionless in this Strict Atmosphere.
I saw this post (it’s a funny post about a wizard showing up at a dude’s house in the middle of the night to eat his snacks and drink his beer) and immediately thought of Dream and Hob, as one does.
So, what if-
After Dream helps free Calliope, he is understandably Wrung Out because really, how many humans like Roderick and Madoc must he deal with in one century?? So he shows up at Hob’s in the middle of the night but he doesn’t want to wake him up - he’s the King of Dreams after all; he won’t pull mortals from his realm unless strictly necessary. Instead he just wanders around curiously, checking out the books on Hob’s shelves, the record player, what records he has, the paintings on the walls, the remote for the TV (why are there so many buttons????), Hob’s desk and the remaining stack of papers he still needs to mark, and finally, eventually wanders into the kitchen. Pokes his finger in the soil of the little herb tray Hob has sitting on the windowsill. It’s a little dry so he waters them. Opens all the cabinets to see what’s in them. Turns the water faucet on. Really, it’s quite fascinating how creative humans can be - figuring out ways to bring themselves fresh water. He yelps when he accidentally sprays himself in the face with the sink hose. Finally opens the fridge and once again it is so fascinating how humans have created things that make procuring and keeping food so easy.
Anyway, Hob hears a commotion and treads carefully towards the kitchen and at first he thinks he’s wandered into a horror movie with all his cabinets being flung open until he spots Dream, head in the fridge, slowly lifting the lid of a pizza box Hob should have thrown out a week ago oops.
“I wouldn’t eat that if I were you.”
Dream startles so badly he turns into a cat and darts onto the top of the fridge.
