ATteNtIOn BajOrAn wOrKErS. That BITCH garak brought federation "FRIENDS" onto the station. Ugh! His buddy Worf's boyfriend Riker is EVERYWHERE and it's so annoying! One minute he's gambling at quark's all polite and diplomatic trying to make "nonviolent negotiations" for me to give up cardassian controlled colonies and the next he and several maquis BajOrAn TerrORistS start assaulting me with cartoonish oversized mallets that make squeaky toy noises and clown honks when they hit me. It's almost like there's two of him! I've locked myself in my office and barricaded the doors until he leaves