Here’s a thing I thought of instead of writing a fic: Julian’s got a new Bond holoprogramme set about 2019 and he invites Garak. 

And he’s been teaching Garak about the Bond double entendres like Pussy Galore etc.

And there’s a Wetherspoons in the programme.

And Garak’s like, ‘hahaha, Doctor, I get it, wet her spoon. Very clever. But actually it doesn’t work like that.’

And he’s very appreciative that Julian tried to make a Cardassian innuendo.

But actually it’s just a Wetherspoons.