Also like. If ur cis please don’t go around asking people their pronouns. I know it sounds like the opposite of what u would expect but I was getting food the other day and this lady around my age who is always there when I am asked my pronouns and it was both jarring and scary. I was like “. Oh . Haha so I guess you can tell I’m a transexual” and she kinda got awkward and said “no ah I ask that to everyone” bullllshit. My bearded roommate came up to order next and she didn’t ask him she just said sir and went on her way as if to prove my point. It’s fucking humiliating being outed like that and I feel like a joke telling people my pronouns also it means that I am visibly not cis and all my work is for naught and I’m constantly on edge because of shit like this
“what are your pronouns” is essentially just “are you a boy or a girl” if you’re Woke
finally thank god someone articulated this for me
It’s not your business what gender someone is. Really. Why does it matter. Why are you asking. Why is it important.
Oh my GOD because you people fucking crucify us if we don’t immediately know and worship whatever gender bullshit you say you are
….arent these ppl thr same mfs that DEMANDED that not knowing someones pronouns shohld be illegal
Omfg if she’d called you sir you would’ve thrown a fucking fit! She was trying to AVOID that. Aren’t TRA always telling us to ask pronouns and normalise it? We can’t fucking win!?
Look at this whiny baby playing the victim. Wow.
How is something so simple, this damn hard. Don’t out or embarrass people in public, and if you misgender someone and they correct you, then refer to them how they’d like. There, communication problem solved
Man giving ppl basic respect sure is a challenge though holy fuck
Basically context matters. Putting your pronouns on your tumblr bio or asking a friend who just came out to you as trans what you should refer to them to isn’t the same as you singling out a stranger who doesn’t pass and publicly asking them ‘so what are you’, especially when you wouldn’t ask this to someone you assumed was cis. If you aren’t sure, you can wait for clue, or pick a pronoun, wait to be corrected, go ‘ah sorry, [correct pronouns]’ and that’s it.
Contrary to anti-sjw beliefs, most peeps dont go around gasping ‘OMG DID U JUST ASSUME MY GENDER’ and rather not be put in the spotlight unprepared. Like sure theres always a pang of unease when someone reads your gender wrong, but that cant always be helped. Often we care more about the response when this person is corrected and the effort put to not make the same mistake.
Social interactions are complex. You cant act like its always either one extreme or another. Nuances exist. It’d be like you put someone in extreme heat and they complain, and then you put them in extreme cold and you get annoyed when they’re not satisfied with it, when really theres no contradiction: we just have to adjust to each other and most of us are fumbling in the dark as well. Making an effort, even if you get it wrong at times and its awkward, isnt too much to ask.