borkyno:

borkyno:

have i told you guys about the time that i classically conditioned my kindergarten class

I got like 4 anons asking about this so I guess I didn’t:

     omg. okay, so basically, I was a “gifted kid” which was code for fucken nerd ass bitch, so i would constantly just stare off into space during class while everyone else was tryna figure out what the fuck our teacher was tryna say. Anyway, I was learning about chemistry and biology outside of school(i know what a fucking nerd amirite ladies), and my dad got me a book that talked about all these famous psychological experiments.

    So chapter one was, would you have guessed it, Pavlov’s dog. I thought it my be fun to try something to that extent with my classmates. Now, keep in mind, being a nerdy ass brown kid in a school full of white ppl meant that I wasn’t exactly popular, and no one really talked to me in class or cared what I was doing.

   Everyday, at 9:45 am, our teacher would announce that it was snacktime, and everyone would fucking sprint to their cubbies to grab their lunchboxes like it was the goddamn hunger games. Kindergarten kids didn’t really have a concept of time, so i used this to my advantage. At 9:45 as my teacher would walk up to announce snacktime, I would knock on my desk really quickly three times. It was rly subtle, and I wasn’t sure that it would work.

   So after two or three weeks, I decided to have some fun. Thirty minutes after school began at like 8:30 or something, I tapped knocked on the desk. Half the class turned their heads and looked straight at the cubbies. 3 boys got up and were about to run to get their lunchbox. One girls stomach started growling REALLY loudly. The teacher had to take 5 minutes to get everyone to calm down and one kid started crying because he thought it was snacktime and he was so shocked and destroyed.

   Realizing that I had basically dog trained the whole class, I burst out laughing so hard I fell out of my chair and cut my head on the tile floor and got sent home early because I was laughing so hard they thought I had a concussion or something. When I explained what happened to my dad he left the room, but I could hear him losing it in the hallway. 

   So everytime now that I learn about classical conditioning in my Neuroscience classes, I have to fight to keep a straight face

morrigannfreeman:

That awkward moment when you procrastinate things you actually want to do and you don’t even know why

righthandofscaevola:

fullten:

head-d0wn:

fullten:

ahchange:

fullten:

Ommmggggggg I just went to a restaurant and the waiter didn’t poison my food, or beat the shit out of me for walking in! They literally just took my order and came back with my food when it was ready. Bless these angels 😊😊😊😊😊😊😍😍😍😍😍😘💯💯💯💯💯💯💯

Literally what you people sound like when you praise cops for not killing innocent people and doing their fucking job

although this is true, cops should still be praised for doing their jobs like they’re saving ur life???

So is everyone else???? Trash collectors, plumbers, janitors, people who make my clothes, literally the majority of jobs on this planet is to make sure humans can exist safely and live longer. Cops are getting paid, well, much better than a lot of other jobs and their jobs aren’t even that dangerous in comparison to others. Like everyone should be praised for doing their job, but at the same time, like the rest of us, the reason they even have a job is because they better be fucking doing it well, not because of some bro code that makes it cool to kill and threaten innocent people (the literal opposite of their job) and then go on a paid vacation.

There needs to be standards.

You’re a moron.
If someone does well in any job they deserve praise, but to compare a policeman to a rubbish collector… Next time someone robs a bank or kills someone, we’ll be sure to get the janitors on it…
You can’t compare a skilled job with menial labour.

Menial labor that keeps diseases from spreading. Janitors are fucking important. All jobs are fucking important. Trash collectors are the like are in fact MORE important than police officers. When the police in nyc were on strike crime was actually down (Google it), when the trash collectors, or transit workers are on strike the city suffers, GREATLY.

Yes, the police should be grateful I compared them to the people who collect trash, because I’m comparing them to people who are actually fucking useful and whose jobs are far more important.

Police work doesn’t make the top 10 list of most dangerous jobs.

“Rubbish collectors” are in the top 10, but not police. People should keep that in mind.