Icon by @ThatSpookyAgent. Call me Tir or Julian. 37. He/They. Queer. Twitter: @tirlaeyn. ao3: tirlaeyn. BlueSky: tirlaeyn. 18+ Only. Star Trek. The X-Files. Sandman. IwtV. OMFD. Definitionless in this Strict Atmosphere.
hades isn’t a badass. hades named his three-headed-guard-of-the-underworld-dog spot. hades whispers to his flowers to make them grow. hades grows fruit. there’s no sun in the underworld.
hades isn’t a badass. stop saying this false thing
In myth, Hades’ most remarked upon traits are 1) how responsible/reliable he is, 2)how sober-minded he is, 3)how dedicated, implacable, and long-remembering he is, and 4)how boring and grim most of the other Olympians think he is to be around. Oh and notably, that if you play him a song he likes, he’ll basically give you anything you ask for(though not without conditions).
Hades is, canonically, a gigantic nerd. If they’d had trainsets, he’d have been the Olympian who collected trainsets, meticulously corrected with exacto knife and hobby-paints the errors toy-makers introduced to those trainsets, and then endlessly talked about those trainsets to anyone sat next to him at Thanksgiving Dinner :| When he wasn’t trying to rope them into an interminable discussion about gardening or divine law, that is :| :| He’s the sort of god who frequently handed out punishment like giving someone a million-piece puzzle where every piece is shaped the same, that resets itself at the start of every day if you don’t complete it, and then he keeps the last piece on his person at all times as a secret private joke for eternity because he finds you personally distasteful(not even because he’s mad at you or hates you particularly; he just doesn’t like you as a person) :| :| :| He is. A Gigantic. Nerd.
He’s also like one of the only gods who is faithful to his wife. And he listens to her like when she asks for a soul to be released and he’s like “But honey, the rules.” And she just gives him that look and he goes “Yes dear,” and lets the soul go with the easiest freaking instructions ever in a myth. And the human still fucks it up. Not his fault Persephone, not Hades’ fault this time. Essentially, Hades is sorta like the accountant suburban dad who collects really specific figurines and gets really grumpy when people mess up his lawn. Do you know how hard his wife worked on those roses? He is calling his attorney. Oh wait, he is also an attorney.
Filed under: Favorite Myths
Everybody knows it’s Persephone that you’ve got to watch out for.
I love this post every time I see it.
Hey, this post may contain sexually explicit content, so we’ve hidden it from public view.
i hate when teachers are like “sorry if im grumpy ive had a class each period haha” like ????? what do you think students do?????
Nuh-uh; it’s different.
Imagine having to go on stage and give your all; to leave everything on stage when you’re done. Imagine singing your heart out and dancing with all you’ve got. Imagine the physical and emotional exhaustion that come from interacting with people who may not even give two shits about you and grasping at the utmost to engage them anyway. Imagine your livelihood depends on how well the audience reacts to everything you do. They’re bored? They fall asleep during the show? Your fault; you’re fired. You reach out to them, you try every trick in the book to make them hear you, and you don’t stop until you succeed, but at the end of each hour, a new audience comes in with a completely new set of needs and interests and things that grab their attention. You must dance, sing, run, crawl. Sometimes you give them absolutely everything, and in spite of it all, the audience is merely apathetic towards you.
Imagine that you cannot leave the stage for 2 hours. You have to pee, but you also have to keep using your voice, so you must keep drinking water, and you know you’re just exacerbating the problem but God help you, you need your voice to involve the audience.You can never break character in those 2 hours. You can never betray what’s going on in your personal life - deaths, illnesses, financial troubles (and you have lots of those). You can never turn off your brain. You must be “on” at all times. You must be engaged and enthusiastic because that is part of your job.
