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mayaangelique:

bellygangstaboo:

Bistreich’s suit alleges that both Gentile — a Democrat who represents Bath Beach, Bay Ridge, Bensonhurst and Dyker Heights — and his chief of staff John Mancuso targeted him because of his diagnosis and tormented him with pranks so distressing he was forced to quit his job in June 2016.

Mancuso once organized a mass-decapitation of the stuffed animals Bistreich kept on his desk.

Bistreich found his Teddy bears with their heads ripped off — with one mounted on a flagpole — and a stuffed toy dog had been gutted and painted red to seem bloody.

The suit also claims the bullying was tolerated and encouraged by Gentile, who laughed and clapped his hands when a staff member compared Bistreich to Avonte Oquendo — the autistic boy who died after escaping his school through an unattended exit — by suggesting Bistreich “test the doors.”

This is so gross! These are grown adults bullying someone like they are on an elementary school playground. I have to continue believing that for every one asshole there are at least two caring people..

Can we send him a buncha stuffed animals please

the-movemnt:

A cab driver called Somali-American Rep. Ilhan Omar “ISIS,” threatened to remove her hijab

  • On Nov. 8, Minnesota elected America’s first Somali-American legislator, Ilhan Omar.
  • After a meeting at the White House on Tuesday, Omar got into a cab back to her hotel.
  • She was then bombarded with “the most hateful, derogatory, Islamophobic, sexist taunts and threats” she’s ever experienced. 
  • Omar wrote on Facebook the cab driver called her “ISIS” and threatened to remove her hijab. 
  • She said she attempted to exit the vehicle as quickly as possible. Read more

follow @the-movemnt

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Anonymous: Please tell the hannukah story with details and swears, here, so I can retell it to my goyim friends, with details and swears
Avatar
swanjolras-blog-archive-deactiv:

CRACKS KNUCKLES. STRETCHES ARMS. OKAY SO LIKE.

so like it’s something something bce and israel/judea/whatever you wanna call it has been INVADED BY THE GREEKS. specifically, invaded by a bro named antiochus, pronounced aunt-eye-oh-kiss, who is a dick.

thing about hanukkah is that, like, there’s the Historical Story, which is important and worthy of study and shit, and then there’s the Hanukkah Story, which is more fun

so in Historical Story the invasion by the greeks was pretty slow and there was a lot of hellenization of jewish culture and blah blah blah 

in Hanukkah Story the greeks SMASHED IN WITH A BUNCH OF SWORDS and were like FUCK YOUR TEMPLE. FUCK YOUR GOD. FUCK YOUR PASSOVER, AND ALSO, FUCK YOU. and they DESTROYED THE TEMPLE and let, like, pigs go running around in it? which, if you know literally anything about judaism: pigs in the temple. they set pigs on the fucking holy fucking temple.

ANyway, then a greek general was like “yo, okay, i am threatening you all with Death unless you sacrifice to zeus.” and everyone was very Stoic and Rebellious until one bro was like FINE!! I WILL SACRIFICE TO ZEUS, GIMME THE STATUE OF ZEUS, IMMA KILL AN ANIMAL AND GO YAY ZEUS. i’m not sure if this also happened in the temple, but i like to think of it happening in the temple, because sacrifices to an idol??? in the holy fucking temple???? and he is almost about to kill the animal WHEN

WHAM, here comes mattathias (a.k.a. matisyahu, a.k.a. no, not the rapper) and CUTS OFF THE BRO’S HEAD.

then he yells ANYONE WHO WANTS TO FIGHT BACK COME TO THE HILLS!!!! and FLEES to the hills along with his sons. their family name is MACCABEE and so they are known as the MACCABEES, which means THE SLEDGEHAMMERS, because this story was apparently NOT METAL ENOUGH ALREADY.

meanwhile the occupation continues. there is a chick named HANNAH, who i have loved for one thousand years because i can either identify with her or hannah-samuel’s-mother, who is boring.

hannah has SEVEN SONS, which is MORE THAN I WOULD LIKE TO HAVE. the greeks capture them all and go “EAT PORK. EAT IT. EAT IT.” hannah and her seven sons are like no!! wtf calm the fuck down with your pork

so the greeks, who have literally no chill, go “okay, we’re gonna torture son #1 until he eats pork.” which they do - except the son does not eat the pork?? and eventually he just like DIES and the greeks are like, WHAT THE FUCK, okay, TIME TO TRY THIS AGAIN.

so they try it with son #2 and it is EQUALLY INEFFECTIVE. NO PORK, NO EATING. the greeks are BEWILDERED, they go on to torture and kill sons #3 THROUGH #7. LITERALLY ALL OF THEM. NONE OF THEM EAT PORK.

the greeks are like “HANNAH. HANNAH. YOU HAVE JUST WATCHED ALL YOUR GODDAMN CHILDREN DIE. EAT THE DAMN BACON.”

but hannah is the most rad of all the jews. she goes “i will not eat your fucking pig because you KILL PEOPLE ABOUT IT. god DAMN calm the fuck down and LET US BE JEWISH LITERALLY WHAT IS YOUR DAMAGE.”

the greeks have an elephant!! the greeks have A HUGE ARMY!! the greeks have a Whole Fucking Empire! the jews have, like, matisyahu and his five kids. (one of them is judah maccabee, who i like to think of as Very Hot.)

and we win.

[intermission: NO-OT BY MI-IGHT AND NO-O-OT BY POWER (TAKE A SHOWER!!!) BUT BY SPIIIIRIT ALONE (RUACH) SHALL WE ALL LIVE IN PEEEEAAAAAAAAAACE.]

so we kick! the greeks! out! of israel/judea/palestine/whatever! and we’re like FUCK YES WE’RE GONNA KICK THE PIGS OUT OF THE TEMPLE WE’RE GONNA CLEAN THE TEMPLE WE’RE GONNA MAKE THE TEMPLE NICE AS SHIT

okay. quick note on the law, for gentiles: one of the most important things about synagogues is that you always gotta have a light in it. it represents god, and it can’t ever, ever go out. it can be electric or fire or anything, but it cannot go out.

so the jews get into the temple and the light is fire, obviously, because electricity has not been invented yet, and the light is almost out.

Oh Shit, say the jews.

there’s oil to keep the light burning. there’s enough oil to keep the light burning for one day. the nearest supply of oil is eight days away, round-trip.

Oh Shit. say the jews.

i mean. what are you gonna do. they send off a guy on a horse to go for the oil. they light up the remaining oil. they scrub the temple floors, and kick the pigs out, and sit, and recover, and wait for the fire to go out.

the fire doesn’t go out.

for one day, it lasts. then for another. for eight fucking days the oil burns, and the horseman returns with the new supply, and the fire is still burning in the temple. the fire never goes out in the temple. we survive the entire invasion and the fire never goes out once.

most jewish stories are stories about survival. this one’s about a little more than that. because we could have assimilated; we could have hellenized. we could have worshiped their gods and eaten pork, and we would have lived.

but we didn’t. we took the worst risk, and we won. and the fire didn’t go out.

fromchaostocosmos:

legally-bitchtastic:

dispatchrabbi:

This is everything I’ve ever hoped for in a retelling of the story of Hannukah. It fits exactly with the way that I like to tell stories from the Torah, and I shall be adopting its style next week.

Let me tell you one of my favorite fucking parts if the maccabee story, which is the story of Judah’d little brother Eleazar, who is known as Eleazar Avaran, which translates to Eleazar the Piercer, because in a family whose name is fucking Sledgehammer, Eleazar was like “how can I make my name even more awesome?” And the story of how he got that name is even more awesome.

So the Maccabee family and Co are fighting the Greeks and it’s not going to well, because they are small with inferior weapons and the Greeks have like the top war fighting technology, which, because tanks hadn’t been invented yet, were elephants. And so the Maccabees are fighting this battle, and the enemies have fucking elephants and things aren’t looking so hot because not only are elephants fucking ginormous, but they are wearing like armor that the Maccabees can’t penetrate And then Eleazar figures out something both brave and kinda stupid, but like in a heroic way, y'know?

He figures out that there’s one elephant that is like decked out in super heavy armor and that one is clearly the one that son of a bitch Antiochus is riding, so he grabs his spear, runs under the elephant and stabs it right in the fucking stomach, which is like the only part of the elephant that is unprotected. He kills the elephant and it turns the tide of the battle, only he ends up dying when the elephant dies on top of him. But it’s like a super heroic sacrifice which totally makes up for the fact that they later found his body is a pile of elephant shit.

I also want to add that Jewish women played like a fucking major role in terms of helping to preserve the Jewish identity that it has become a thing that women should not have to do any work over Channukah and have a break from the many responsibilities that lie on Jewish women’s shoulders in honor of their hard work.

Basically it is Jewish women kicked ass is so many ways so hard this time that Jewish women on Channukah get to have a break from being the boss, head of the household, the bedrock, etc.

 Jewish women are fucking awesome.

adventurotica:

Reblog if you have ever used Netflix to stream a movie or show that you own on DVD because streaming meant you didn’t have to get up.

We actually have been buying movies on Google Play that we own on DVD, because we don’t have a player for them anymore. But we never watched them even when we had a player, because it is too much damn trouble to deal with them.

eearth:

it’s wild to think that like.. all the raw materials to make like an iphone.. or a laptop.. or the internet.. have all existed for literally the entire history of humanity.. all the stuff.. has been here.. on earth.. and all the natural forces.. electricity… magnetism.. have all existed.. but.. we just didn’t know how to put it all together.. like… i wonder what miracles exist around us.. right now.. at this very moment.. that we can’t even imagine 

bidoof:

this is my grasp of how football works: two teams of men want the ball very badly but are incapable of sharing it. one team attempts to deliver the ball to their holy ground while the other attempts to prevent this. occasionally an evil man will appear and speak curses to the men, causing them grief and dishonor

todaysdocument:

Astronaut and Senator John Glenn, 7/18/1921 - 12/08/2016

We are saddened to learn of the passing of Astronaut and Senator John Glenn earlier today.  Glenn was the first American to orbit the Earth aboard Friendship 7 as one of @nasa’s original “Mercury Seven” astronauts, served as a United States Senator from Ohio from 1974 - 1999, and was the oldest human to go into space aboard the Space Shuttle Discovery mission STS-95 in 1998 at age 77.