punkpoemprose:

marvelousmacey:

iamfrenchfrie:

mieshasmoore:

iamchinyere:

Today my professor told me every cell in our entire body is destroyed and replaced every seven years. How comforting it is to know that one day I will have a body that you will have never touched.

This just made me feel so warm.

thank you.

Important especially for victims of abuse, remember your body is yours and it heals in more ways than you realize.

Okay, so I just want to say that this isn’t necessarily true. Most of your cells have died and regrown several times in seven years, but some haven’t, and some have died and won’t return. The seven year cell renewal is a myth perpetuated by popsci in magazines everywhere.

That being said, anywhere they may have touched you, your skin, your hair, your nails and so on, was changing the moment they departed your life, even before that. Your skin became skin they’ve never touched within 27 days. Your hair grows (on average) six inches per year, so depending on how long yours is, you were rid of their touch there within a few years tops. Your nails will completely regrow within six months tops. You were a body they never touched within three or four years. You will be a body they never touched within three or four years.

You have been rewriting your body, you are your own, you are constantly changing, and you are the only one who owns your body 100% of the time.

punkpuppydragon:

cindysuke:

ernmark:

Just learned about garden path sentences.

They’re basically a literary prank– the sentence starts out in such a way that you think you know where it’s going, but the way it ends completely changes the meaning while still being a complete and logical sentence. Usually it deals with double meanings, or with words that can be multiple parts of speech, like nouns and verbs or nouns and adjectives.

So we get gems like

• The old man the boat. (The old people are manning the boat)
• The complex houses married and single soldiers and their families. (The apartment complex is home to both married and single soldiers, plus their families)
• The prime number few. (People who are excellent are few in number.)
• The cotton clothing is usually made of grows in Mississipi. (The cotton that clothing is made of)
• The man who hunts ducks out on weekends. (As in he ducks out of his responsibilities)
• We painted the wall with cracks. (The cracked wall is the one that was pained.)

truly a strange language

Thanks I hate it

breelandwalker:

bethanyactually:

pathofneedlespathofpins:

angrila:

princess-starr:

pkeradactyl:

editorincreeps:

Princess Bride themed restaurant. Waiters say “as you wish” after taking your order.

Finish the Fezzik in an hour, your meal is free.

Come in a wheelbarrow, your meal is 10% off.

Every so often the hostess will say “bye bye boys, have fun storming the castle!” as people are leaving.

Miracle Max’s Cure for the Mostly Dead is on the menu and its a giant chocolate cakeball.

The servers will sometimes switch your wines after distracting you.

They sell Anybody Want a Peanut Brittle at the door.

“There are a shortage of perfect chicken breasts in the world. Twould be a pity not to order these.”

“Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. I’ll be your server.

Prepare to dine.”

Instead of “large,” you get an item of unusual size.

People on their anniversary get to listen to a recitation of the mawidge speech.

The kitchen door says “Brute Squad.”

When servers bring drinks to your table, they casually mention one of them might have iocane powder in it.

On certain nights, you can engage the bartender in a battle of wits. If you win, you get a free drink. Beware - the bartender is a Sicilian.

If you can recite Westley’s “To The Pain” speech or Vizzini’s part from “Battle of Wits” from memory, you get 10% off.

The dessert menu is called The Gate Key. The servers all say there is no gate key. If you respond with “Fezzik, tear their arms off,” they’ll produce it with a reply of “Oh you means THIS gate key.”

Someone just liked one of my text posts from 2 ½ years ago. Wtf

redbeardace:

Originally posted by redbeardace

Go forth and awarify people!