Icon by @ThatSpookyAgent. Call me Tir or Julian. 37. He/They. Queer. Twitter: @tirlaeyn. ao3: tirlaeyn. BlueSky: tirlaeyn. 18+ Only. Star Trek. The X-Files. Sandman. IwtV. OMFD. Definitionless in this Strict Atmosphere.
So I was going to write a post talking about Jean-Honoré Fragonard’s painting The Swing, which is, as you all know, business as usual around here. Now, the first step in any art post is finding a high-quality image, which put me on Google, which in turn led me to this.
And this is–I mean. Look, this moment slipped my mind, all right? I saw Frozen once, was deeply unimpressed, and never thought about it again. I forgot that it contained a blissfully unaware nod to a dirty painting.
Yeah. Surprise! The Swing is a dirty goddamn painting.
Duh, you say, that guy’s looking straight up her dress, but that’s mid-range dirty at best, this is eighteenth century France, the aristocracy got dirtier than that on their way to breakfast. And presumably also at breakfast. A swing isn’t good enough! More filth! Better filth, you demand, beating your hands on the table.
Well, let me just assure you that you are looking at genuinely fun dirty, and hopefully that holds you over while we take a little trip into background. Buckle in for a very French story.
Sometime in the 1760s, painter Gabriel François Doyen, fresh off the success of several large-scale religious paintings, was contacted by a “gentleman of the court”, who had seen his work and been moved by it. Pleased by the attention, Doyen went to meet this courtier, and discovered him at what he later described as “a pleasure house”, entangled an an amorous embrace with his mistress. The following exchange, related by Doyen to a writer friend of his several years after the fact, went something like this:
“Monsieur Doyen, I was so moved by your work! The angels, the colors, the piety. Its beauty is unrivaled!”
“Well, that’s–very kind of you. Although I do…that is. If you and your–ah, young lady would rather I returned later–”
“Nonsense, sit down, sit down! You should be as comfortable as we are.”
At which point Doyen, more or less trapped, did pull up a chair, although presumably not without giving it a surreptitious wipe with his handkerchief first.
The young aristocrat, whose identity is unknown, was apparently so impressed by Doyen’s religious work that he hoped to commission the artist for something decidedly less religious.
Just try to imagine it: Doyen sitting on the edge of some louche-looking parlour chair while a young man in a highly noticeable state of undress cuddles with his equally nude lady friend and describes what will surely be a masterpiece.
“I should like to see madame–” (history doesn’t tell us if he booped her nose here, but I like to imagine he did) “On a swing, being pushed by a bishop. But you will place me in such a way that I will be able to see the legs of the lovely girl, and better still, if you would like to enliven your picture a little more…”
Now you’d think, wouldn’t you, that Doyen would have gone a little pale at this and made his excuses, but hilariously, he appears to kind of get into it, all of a sudden suggesting, "Ah Monsieur, it is necessary to add to the essential idea of your picture by making Madame’s shoes fly into the air and having some cupids catch them.”
Flying shoes, he said. Essential, he said. Remember that for later.
In the end though, for whatever reason, Doyen decided not to take the commission, and passed it to Jean-Honoré Fragonard, who took the idea, looked at it, decided “too tame.”
Now, the only thing he really changed from the initial idea was the bishop. The man pushing the swing is now just a dude. A significantly older dude than the young man in the foreground, though, which is notable. We don’t know for certain why this alteration was made, maybe Fragonard didn’t want to get on the wrong side of the church. Or maybe he just sucked at drawing vestments.
The old not-bishop is hidden in shadow, holding the rope of the swing, his age and restraint rendering him unimportant. This is an image for the young and passionate. The girl on the swing leaves the trees behind, flying with her knees open towards the statue of Cupid, who holds a finger to his lips, signifying the illicit nature of this encounter. And like, make no mistake, this is an encounter. Our unnamed aristocrat lies on the ground, twined around with blossoming undergrowth, his eyes directed beneath her skirts, and his arm erect, reaching for what he sees. He holds his hat in his hand, a funny little detail until you remember that in late 18th century erotic art, men’s hats (and their bared heads) were often directly analogous with their dicks. No one ever said Rococo was subtle, okay.
The swing (and the young lady on it) are at the peak of their movement, all fluttering pinks and the soft, sinuous curve of her body beneath the glistening silk, and just as she’s gone as far as she can go, positioned over her lover’s outstretched arm, with her toes pointed at Cupid–her shoe flies off. (A missing shoe, by the way, and a bare foot, were neck-and-neck with the broken pitcher in the French Symbols Of Lost Virginity Sweepstakes.)
All of which is to say, The Swing is a painting of an orgasm.
I almost don’t know where to take it from here. Um, let’s see. Well, this became an iconic image of the Rococo period, thanks to the rich colors, freedom of movement and the finished image’s contagious joy. Mostly-contagious, anyway, Enlightenment philosophers hated it, presumably because they weren’t getting laid. But it really is hard not to smile looking at it. That girl’s having a great time.
Such a great time, in fact, that Anna from Frozen probably shouldn’t be reenacting it. Even with both her shoes on.
Ya’ll Egypt just had the most deadliest militant attack in the country’s modern history.A group of
assailants targeted the al-Rawda mosque in the town of Bir al-Abed. The people were doing nothing but worshiping and praying on this Friday morning (11/24/17), until the assailants launched a bomb and started shooting. Over 230 people were killed by the bomb and/or gunfire. No one has claimed responsibility, but this is still a horrifying tragedy. I know it can be hard to keep up with national news in the US, but Egypt deserves as much attention and condolences.
Reblogging because it seems like people only care about the Middle East when affecting them.
I know alot of people do this and I do ask from time to time when money gets tight but this is the real first time i’m asking for like possible donations for a huge emergency.
Last night my phone got knocked into a drink and I thought i had saved it in time. Did the rice thing and everything. I wake up to find it clicking constantly and acting like i’m hitting the back button. None of this good.
For me my phone is a literal life line. I’m someone has sporadic black outs. I’ve been tested and it’s mainly a reason I keep a phone on me at all times. I have small alerts if I should black out and faint.
So lemme get to the point.
Here is my Kofi and Paypal.me
I beg people almost to help if they can and I’ll try to be quick between work and such with pictures as thank yous. I hope you all understand they will be clean sketched with colors but it’s mainly what i can do as thank you for helping me.
If you want to make the world a better place for mentally ill and neurodivergent people, get into the habit of shutting down people who mock/laugh at/sneer at “odd” or “weird” but harmless behaviour. Just refuse to laugh with them and say “That’s not funny.” or “They’re not doing any harm.” Do this whether or not anyone who’s directly negatively affected hears it. This is both about protecting people from ableist verbal abuse, AND about teaching ableists that their attitudes are not being tolerated and that you’re not going to bond with them over ableism (or, hopefully, any other form of oppression).
good post
My fav is saying “I don’t get it” or “what’s the problem/joke?” and forcing people to admit that they’re just being assholes.
[Image description: drawing of a purple cloud and a green cloud above a caption that says “Being unhappy doesn’t mean you’ll always be unhappy and it doesn’t mean you deserve to be unhappy. Even if you’ve been unhappy for a long time, you are still capable of happiness in the future and you are still worthy of that happiness. You’re going to feel happy again.” in light blue text on a dark blue background.]
Realization that took me about 25 years: when Emperor Palpatine tells Luke “Strike me down with all your hatred, and your journey towards the Dark Side will be complete,” he’s not saying something deep about the nature of evil and the ease of turning into the bad guy. He’s just making a last-ditch gambit to not get his ass lightsabered. Luke’s kind of a sucker for falling for it.
Luke’s already decided violence is an acceptable tactic, based on the dozens of nameless troopers and pilots he’s blasted into subatomic particles, so why would the Emperor be any different? Killing the Emperor isn’t going to make Luke a different kind of killer just because he killed someone with a visible face, and it’s certainly not going to make him start blowing up planets or torturing prisoners just for funsies. Luke could have said “Strike you down? Don’t mind if I do,” done just that, and not only would the battle have ended the same way, his dad might have survived.
(And if Vader had survived, repented, and rejoined the Light Side, but retained his influence over the Imperial military, he could have saved everyone a whole lot of grief in the coming years.)
–
The point is, sometimes when your enemies say “You’re playing right into my hands! The harder you oppose me, the more power I get!”, they’re actually just scared and full of bullshit. Never forget to consider that possibility.
It’s literally just the “so much for the tolerant Left!” bullshit